1. Make sure you know that there is more than one bus service from the Vienna airport to Bratislava and where the bus will stop, because if you are waiting at the wrong place it can be quite problematic.
2. Don’t take the dog with you to meet the bus in case he rolls in human excrement because you are waiting at the wrong place for well over an hour. Trying to clean off with an old tissue in your pocket doesn’t work very well.
3. When you finally work out there is another bus service which arrives at another stop, make sure you know where that other stop is so don’t spend added time calling and asking people trying to work out where you should be going. Also, when you finally work out where the new bus stop is, take a taxi as walking takes too long because it is further away than you think.
4. Don’t let the dog who has rolled in human excrement jump up with excitement when he finally sees your friend which means he reaches out to pat him and…well you get the picture. Also, don’t let the dog who has rolled in human excrement anywhere near you when you sit in the taxi on the way home because it may get on your coat.
5. Make sure your husband doesn’t leave the car door slightly open so that when he goes to take the car to meet your friend’s wife (who was flying in from another location) it has a flat battery and your friend has to take a taxi to meet her while your husband rushes around looking for jumper cables.
6. Make sure there is no two-day rugby tournament on TV because you may be tempted to keep watching it even though this is very boring for your friends.
7. When you decide to drive to visit an Abbey in nearby Hungary, make sure you have the correct directions so that you don’t get lost and argue with your husband about it as you drive around in circles for a while.
8. When you take them to Vienna to try one of your favourite lemon tarts, make sure you know where the cafe is and that sometimes it looks different because it is winter and they have removed the outside chairs and then when you finally do find it, you need to book ahead as it is a very popular place.
9. Try and prevent your dog from jumping in your friend’s suitcase and playing with her bra, trying to bite her and then entangling himself in her lovely jumper which could cause holes.
10. Last but by no means least; try to avoid pouring rain and/or sickness when you have visitors as neither is much fun.
In case you get the wrong idea, we really enjoyed the weekend and had a great time with our friends. I am just not sure they would be able to say the same.