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Ten things it is better not to do in Europe

Posted by on September 26, 2013

I have lived in Europe for long enough now to have figured out a few things it is better not to do.

Berlin 013

Come eat me Fay!!!

  1. Don’t make too many trips from Bratislava to eat a lemon tart that you discovered in a cafe in Vienna because soon your jeans will not fit and people like your husband will notice. 
  2. Don’t giggle when you see signs in German like Gute Fahrt because it is very juvenile.
  3. Don’t tell people you are studying Slovak because they will expect you to have learned something.
  4. Don’t wear high heels and then expect to be able to walk on the cobbled streets of the Old City. You will look like you have had way too much to drink even if you haven’t.
  5. Don’t keep starting sentences with “When I lived in Africa…”  (or anywhere else you have lived) or mention anything about rugby because nobody really cares.
  6. Don’t say to some women at an International Women’s Group coffee morning that you are interested in helping with something because before you know it you are in meetings and spending hours on your computer but not getting paid for all that hard work.
  7. Don’t keep thinking about all the house help you used to have in Africa and Asia because you are finding all the housework quite annoying and time consuming and you aren’t as good as it as you used to be.
  8. Don’t tell your husband that you can’t be bothered making dinner because you are too full of lemon tart because he won’t be very impressed.

    Bunce waiting to go for a walk

    Please, please take me for a walk

  9. Don’t expect your Jack Russell dog to think that just because it is cold and raining he won’t want you to take him out for a walk so he can chase something.
  10. Don’t keep posting photos on facebook/blog/twitter of your trips because your family and friends think you are just showing off. And also don’t think that just because there are so many more places you are dying to visit right on your doorstep, your husband will not want to stay home on the odd weekend.
  11. (Ooops sorry, more than 10 but last one I promise). Don’t keep dreaming about that lemon tart when you are supposed to be listening to someone talk or working on your computer or sitting in church or walking to the supermarket or doing housework or in a meeting or pretty much anywhere you happen to be.

10 Responses to Ten things it is better not to do in Europe

  1. Adrian

    Sounds like I’m gonna have to try that lemon tart when I come to visit in May next year! Is it on the Atkins diet plan?

  2. Marti

    I’m hooked on the picture – can just imagine the taste. Next time you feel like lemon tart – have one for me – I will sort the hips out afterwards! Even our home group eats can’t come close to that master piece! Xxm

  3. Cathy

    Gosh,Fay. That lemon tart looks as though it’s worth hubby noticing that the jeans don’t fit! Can understand your dreaming about it, even if it is one of the (11 ) things you shouldn’t be doing in Europe. Enjoy!!

  4. Petra Vorster

    Hi Fay,
    Blame the detergent in Bratislava for your jeans not fitting…not compatible with detergent you used in South Africa. Please keep your blog ‘running’. I love you sharing all your experiences from ALLL over the world. The ones who do not appreciate it, does not have to read or listen about it. Must admit I will also stay clear of your Nr 6.

    Have a great time. Sniffs from Cleo to Bunce.

    • Fay Foster

      Hi Petra,
      I appreciate your comment about the detergent (am sure you are right) and very glad you are enjoying my blog.
      Bunce sends sniffs back and wants Cleo to know that he is not looking forward to winter!

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